Anxiety That Looks Like Anger, Overthinking, or Perfectionism
By Tannia Salazar, APRN | Rooted in Serenity Behavioral Health
When we hear the word “anxiety,” most people picture someone who’s visibly nervous, shaky, or panicked.
But anxiety doesn’t always look like panic. In fact, it often shows up in ways that are misunderstood, especially in high-functioning adults.
I see many clients who never thought they had anxiety—because their symptoms didn’t look “typical”, but they were snapping at loved ones, obsessing over details, or constantly pushing themselves to be perfect.
Let’s talk about what anxiety really looks like—and why naming it matters.
Anxiety Isn’t Just Panic Attacks
Anxiety is a nervous system response. It can cause physical, emotional, and cognitive symptoms—and it doesn’t always scream.
Some people feel anxiety in their chest or stomach. Others feel it in their thoughts: looping, racing, spiraling. And for some, anxiety shows up in their behavior—like irritability, people-pleasing, or overcontrol.
Common but Misunderstood Signs of Anxiety
Irritability or Anger
You’re not “mean.” You’re dysregulated.
When your nervous system is on high alert, even small things can feel overwhelming—and anger becomes a fast-release valve. Many people with anxiety don’t realize that reactivity or snapping is actually a stress response.
Overthinking and Mental Looping
Replaying conversations. Obsessing over what someone meant. Creating worst-case scenarios in your head.
Anxious brains are wired to prepare—but sometimes that preparation turns into paralysis.
Perfectionism
Holding yourself to impossible standards isn’t always about achievement—it’s often about control. If you grew up in an unpredictable or high-pressure environment, perfectionism might have felt like a survival skill. Underneath it? Anxiety.
Exhaustion or Burnout
When your brain never gets to “power down,” your body will eventually crash. Fatigue, low motivation, and irritability are often signs of hidden anxiety—not laziness or depression.
Constant Distraction
Doomscrolling, micromanaging, checking your inbox five times in a row—it might look like avoidance, but it’s often an anxious attempt to feel some sense of control or stimulation.
Why It’s Easy to Miss (Especially in Women & High-Achievers)
If you're constantly juggling responsibilities, managing emotions for others, or putting pressure on yourself to hold it all together, anxiety can get buried under a polished surface.
And if you’ve been praised your whole life for being organized, productive, or driven, you might not realize that your achievements are powered by chronic tension.
You might not feel “anxious.” You might just feel tired. On edge. Never enough.
What Happens When You Name It
Naming anxiety doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you—it means you can stop blaming yourself for struggling in silence.
When you understand that irritability, perfectionism, or overthinking are symptoms—not personality flaws—you open the door to relief.
Whether that means therapy, medication, nervous system regulation, or just learning to soften the pressure you put on yourself, treatment can be tailored to your needs.
How We Help at Rooted in Serenity
We take a trauma-informed, culturally responsive approach to anxiety care. We understand that your symptoms may not fit neatly into a box—and we don’t expect them to.
Whether your anxiety looks like panic, people-pleasing, or silent overthinking, our job is to meet you with curiosity, compassion, and tools that help.
We offer:
💚 Thoughtful psychiatric medication management
🌱 Support for first-time and returning patients
📍 Secure telehealth visits for adults across Connecticut
🇪🇨 Bilingual care available (Hablamos Español)
You Deserve to Feel Calmer In Your Own Mind
If any part of this post resonated with you, it might be time to explore what anxiety looks like for you.
You don’t need to wait until it gets worse. You can start and feel rooted again 💚
📗 Learn more about emotional regulation here
🪴 Services
🔗 Skip straight to Pre-Intake Form
❓ FAQ
🌼 More about the author, Tannia Salazar
Founder of Rooted in Serenity Behavioral Health LLC, offering telepsychiatry services across Connecticut for adults navigating anxiety, ADHD, trauma, and more.
